Be Kind to Yourself!

Do you find that you miss out on a lot of social events due to flare-ups, surgery and recovery.  Surgery has become part of my life over the last few years and this Christmas I will be having another arthroscopy which will put me out of action for 2 weeks or so.  In this time I will be off work and I only started my new job in October,  I will miss the staff Christmas party and the secret santa and most likely not get paid for being off work. 

I have come to terms with the fact that my health is going to be tough and take one day at a time, but I also will not let it beat me!  I will do my best to keep in touch with friends over Christmas from behind my computer,  will probably be doing my Christmas shopping online and will hopefully be waited on hand and foot!

But what impact does this have on my mental health?  We are expected to attend all the events and if we don’t we are frowned upon,  having to justify why I won’t be at work as I get funny looks for even thinking about being off for 2 weeks?  It is so easy to doubt myself and try to do as much as I am expected to do.  My mind is naturally negative and every day is a fight to stay positive.  Again….. I will not let it beat me! 

Being a perfectionist doesn’t help either as I feel the need to do everything 100% and be at everything 100%.  I have worked on this for a few years following my epiphany that “I am going to dance like nobody’s watching”, but it is so ingrained in my mind that it is a daily fight!

My heart goes out to of all the homeless people this year who may have health issues to deal with as well as being on the street,  I cannot imagine how I would cope without my comfortable bed and warm winter sheets, my amazing family to look after my every need. 

The best advice I have been given was by a friend I worked with at school and he said to me “be kind to yourself”,  but what does this mean?  For me it means that I don’t have to judge myself for not being able to do everything and be at everything over the Christmas period.  I also need to let those that judge me know that their judgement will not influence my mood.  It means taking time out to be mindful everyday,  focus on my breathing and enjoy some me-time.  It means taking one day at a time in manageable chunks so that I do not get overwhelmed.  It also means allowing others to do for me what I can’t do for myself and not feel like a burden.

So I say “Be kind to yourself”, and wish you all a healthy Christmas and a restful new year.